Gypos Creepos

I have been introduced lately to a new kind of people: I have labeled them extreme bullshitters to aid in my lab tests of human stupidity.

I have been lately introduced to the fact that most people full of shit happen to be Egyptians, makes me so not proud of being one, yet I have found a few normal people amidst the crappy crowds which gives me some hope their disease of normalcy would be infectious to everyone around.

I have been lately introduced to… umm… people who have no concepts or beliefs, دلاديل , you may say or at least that is how we could call them in Egypt.

Don’t close the window.

The show hasn’t started yet.

The First Chapter: Introducing Me:

I am a man who likes to reason, who loves to work out his head and see through the logic of things as he debates and argues. But, I have also been taught bullshit, I know how to bullshit anyone all around. In fact I could be beyond doubt the best bullshitter if I had to be.

Yet, I don’t bullshit people a lot, in fact the chances I start bullshitting some one are slim to none and I use the logical methodology to debate, argue and discuss. I love using my brain, guess that is the reason I have been given it.

Allow me to lay down the first ground rule to play the debating game with me:

Rule No. 1

Don’t bullshit a bullshitter. And don’t you dare bullshit me for all that matters. If you try, I will bullshit you and leave you fucking speechless you would wish you were never born.

The Second Chapter: Freedom of Speech:

Freedom of speech: how is that for a very good excuse to feed others our bullshit?

Ladies and Gentlemen, not only in Egypt but everywhere, allow me to introduce my idea of freedom of speech, if you all may.

Calling someone names or asking him to go fuck himself is not freedom of speech. Freedom of speech is giving an opinion, with full respect to the feelings and opinions of others in the surrounding environment.

The Third Chapter: Respecting Religion:

Criticizing someone’s rituals and someone’s religious beliefs is not a freedom of religion. It is bullshit.

Insulting someone’s beliefs and cursing someone’s religion is not freedom it is bullshit.

Insulting your very own religion (A current blogging trend) is not all cool and hip, if it proves something, it is only lack of principles and bullshit.

Allow me to lay down the second ground rule to play the debating game with me:

Rule No. 2

Wanna discuss someone else’s religion do it with respect or put a sock in it cause you can’t be rude with the excuse of ‘Freedom of Speech’, freedom of speech my ass.

And this goes for all religions and for all people, be those me or anyone else.

Rule No. 3

Gypos: Let’s stop being all contradictive as we try to seem all angelic while actually being all devilish as we speak of manners and good actions. We are either bullshitting or logical. Choose one and stick by it and then people like me would know how to deal with you all.

Rule No. 4

Don’t put you ass in the fire and then complain about getting burnt. In other words don’t provoke someone with your bullshit and start complaining of people’s reflex actions.

Rule No. 5

Stop changing your words and act like your intentions were misunderstood. You say something, stick to it instead of acting all weird and start lying.

Dear Gypos,

I am writing this to inform you all that lately I have been disgusted by your weird group behavior. The real hypocrisy is to lie and manipulate facts to look cool and gain acceptance by the weirdos surrounding you. I have come to believe that there is no hope ever in this country of ours ever getting any better because apparently, you all won’t let it go anywhere good with your insensitive, disrespectful natures.

You all are starting to make asses out of your selves, you keep judging each other while not looking to your actions and more importantly you have lately started criticizing each other’s religions. Here is one thing I know, you all complain of the tension that arises between Muslims and Christians in Egypt. I for one don’t have anything against anyone or any religion. But don’t cause the problem and then come back crying and complaining. I think what you all do is more than enough to start tension between nations and not people of different religions.

And please quit bullshitting and be normal…

مالآخر عيشوا عيشة أهاليكو

Entertainment Every Night

There is something so amusing about people that I can’t understand. I can just say that the amusement here is being felt and enjoyed. People entertain me in their very own weird way and with their very own weird words; be those written or spoken. Browsing through blogs I see people write a lot about their lives, there is a lot of funny and weird shit out there I have got to say.

But what makes me real amazed and amused is people’s tendency to lie to themselves, to be hypocrites when the moment comes in which they gotta give an opinion about themselves and to act like they know they could do what from reading through their blogs you could easily tell they couldn’t.

Needless to say people are full of it, they seek your attention, your recognition, they all wanna be gods, wanna be praised and prayed to, wanna be everything you would look up to, hiding behind the anonymity that they seem to believe their blogs give them, it doesn’t give that much of an anonymity and if you can’t see my flaws through my blog, if you can’t see I am full of my very own shit, my very own weird nature then you are just plain blind…

This morning I read through blogs, people who discovered they were wrong after a zillion years they have lived and admitting it long after they should have, and yet when you see people show the promising faces of we are gonna change or we changed, and right around the moment you are about to believe them, some where amidst all the lines they right you can read a statement that they try to make that tells you they are still full of themselves, they are still full of the very same shit, they still have those huge egos with no personality whatsoever, they still have that arrogance that is gonna burn them alive, you see it and you smile cause you know that is basic human nature…

People lie, they cheat, they steal, they don’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves, most people do all, I do some, it is plain human to be so… I think this last statement have been made a million times by myself, I should stop trying to make it clear to everyone that I could see through their fucked up motives, I should just act in malice and start not giving a fuck, the warning is something they do not deserve, do they?

Some People

Words I remembered today as I browsed through some blogs:

من رأى منكم منكرا فليغيره بيده، فإن لم يستطع فبلسانه، فإن لم يستطع فبقلبه، وذّلك أضعف الإيمان

<br<

I think trying to please other people is not my game… So I think these words I stated are enough…. I have my point of view and I have to defend it cause that is what I call integrity…. So guess I will keep defending such an opinion as long as I live….

My Idiot Supervisors….

“How lucky can an auditor be, I killed him when he pushed me, like a fellow once said ain’t my job like shit…”

My two audit supervisors stink…. One has a breath issue and the other, oh the other he actually smells maybe it is not too obvious but I have an extra care for hygiene issues that makes me always alert to shit like this….

The first one is a skeleton rather than just thin, almost extinct with his annoying slimness, and he is always on a diet, what a freaking girl, he wants to keep his posture. Well I hope he never walks into the office with make-up all over his face… He wouldn’t make a pretty hermaphrodite….

The other one is a short weirdo, who reminds me of the old Mario game, and when he was promoted some time a year ago I decided also to change his title from Mario to Super Mario… The one difference between him and the game is he never finds those mushrooms that would help him grow which makes me confused, should I pity him or should I just feel like kicking him….

The first is full of that foxy malice and the second is full of that non-sexy vibe that wouldn’t attract a chicken and yet he thinks he knows a lot about women…. They are both freaks, fun freaks and they think they give me a hard time and well I gotta be honest they both make me laugh and it gets funnier everyday….

So the short SOB thinks he is the smartest with his brand new MBA degree that makes him untouchable or whatever shit he thinks and his total inability to pass a professional qualification exam because he is an academic freak…. He also thinks he is immortal I guess or he acts like he is and he has the best way of informing you of how he fears no one and then chicken out when he is facing any one and everyone….

And well you short freak, regarding your Arthur & Anderson experience, first you don’t stress the ‘e’ in Anderson like it is almost an ‘I’ and well you always make me feel like you are the only person who ever worked there, guess what, you are not… So up your ass my friend and if I ever hear the name of that extinct firm again I am gonna have to stick my foot in your ass, you sick piece of shit…

The other freak thinks he knows what no one else knows and thinks he is deceiving everyone but well some people are not that easy to trick, I dunno how he never noticed that I am not an easy target for deception and I will never be…. And well the freak lies about everything and acts like everything is a huge secret… FUCK YOU MAN….

And well you both take both my middle fingers as a token of friendship and peace, well a piece up your asses….

Guess that’s it, you freaks…

And here’s one last message for both of you:
Dear Supervisors,
Please go fuck yourselves and may you both burn in hell…..
To Possibilities…